Letters to Someone

Dear Dinner Table ~

Your load has been light lately, I know. But I say, be grateful for the time off. The holidays are just around the corner and you know how I love to entertain! For now, I promise to make a crock pot o' something so we can enjoy your company, as well as something that requires a basket of rolls. Very soon, I promise. It's not that we love the kitchen island more, but it does seem more appropriate for tater tots and turkey sandwiches. Ya know? Don't sulk - it's not becoming of you. We'll see you for Sunday dinner.

Fondly,

The Lady Who's Not a Gourmet Cook

Dear So Cal Freeway Drivers ~
Some water on the road should not turn a 35 minute drive into a 2 hour drive. Do you hear me? Should. Not. I know that rain is foreign here in the land of milk & honey, but experience has shown me that we'll live through it. I also happen to know that water falling from the sky will not permanently damage your Range Rover. I promise. And driving 42 miles per hour on the freeway won't make it go away. It will just make you sit in the rain longer. And me. And I don't like it. Move along, please.

More Than a Little Frustrated,

The Rainy Day Driver

Dear Overweight Spaniel ~

Your spotty snoot is just the cutest and I say time and time again that you're the sweetest dog ever. Ever. But holy smokes do you have the worst manners in the world!!!! I've been trying to train the babes to close the bathroom doors to curb you of your lust for toilet water. We'll keep working on that one. And I am a little sorry for smacking you with a pillow in the middle of the night, but I just can't understand why you have a need to groom at 1 AM. The big, black man sleeping next to you is your BROTHER and no one else in the house cares what you look like. Give it a rest. Go night night like everyone else and I'll keep letting you sleep here. Blow me off and you might be outside with the raccoons. I think they could take you. Knock it off, sister!!

Big Hugs & Kibble,
Mom


Dear Household Appliances ~

Do you all get together with Buzz and Woody in Andy's bedroom and talk about your plans and dreams?  I am thinking you must communicate somehow and just don't understand why you've scheduled a revolt right now.  We were squeaking by with the duct tape on the washing machine even if I did have to squeeze my eyes shut each time I walked past, but then you decided to flash a brand new error message and quit altogether.  Not cool.  And now the oven.  WTF? It IS possible we're going to want clean clothes and dinner on the same day.  Will you please cooperate.  Pretty, pretty please?  I'd love a shopping trip this weekend, but not where you live.

So Over It Right Now,
Me

Every Thursday you can head over to Shortmama's and read her letters and see what her bloggy friends have to say, too. It's always a good time around here!