Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Maybe "That Mom" Was on to Something

When I was growing up there were two girls that you did NOT want to cross. Their Mom was a little bit vicious and insane overprotective and everyone knew to tread lightly with her girls.  She would confront anyone, anywhere who was not treating her girls exactly as she felt they should be treated.  It didn't matter if you were 9 (I was, the first time she caught up with me) or 49.  Nita Holland was "That Mom".  I've spent the last 30 years thinking that she was crazy and overbearing. Now I am wondering if she might have been just a little bit genius.

We've not had much experience with E or me feeling the need to stick up for our kids.  There's the occassional kerfuffle at the beach or playground where I tell some kid to scram, but nothing that even sticks out in my mind.  We've had great coaches, great teachers and generally an easy go of it with all things kid politics.  Until now.

Baseball season started at the end of February and we still haven't figured out if The Athlete's coach is entirely unethical or if he just doesn't like kids that don't have his last name.  Every week reveals another crack in his creepy facade and it's just becoming too much for us.  His son is a great baseball player, but he is also obnoxious, rude and allowed to do anything he pleases.  I watched "Coach" (I do use the term loosely) fudge the line up this weekend and try to remove kids at the bottom of the order in an effort to put his son back at the plate.  My instinct is to rip his head off and use it in the next inning, but I somehow catch myself and realize that wouldn't be in the best interest of my child.  I barely catch myself.  I daydream a little too often about letting him have it.  I'm just dying to go all "That Mom" on him.

It is definitely painful to watch The Athlete progressively become less confident in himself as this idiot plows through the season favoring his son and a couple of other teammates.  Head down, hat over his eyes, sitting on the bench . . . Not my favorite pose.  It's even more painful to hear from other teams and coaches that they don't like playing us and that our Coach's interpretation of the rules is questionable.  Being categorized with the likes of him is the much bigger problem for us.  That is not how we roll.

So what's a girl to do?  Drag out my Nita Holland book of crazy and just get it off my chest?  Report him to the League?  Take The Athlete off the team?  They all seem possible, but none seem just right.  But it would be a relief to be "That Mom" just this one time . . .  No one deserves it more than my Baby Boy

17 comments:

MiMi said...

What sucks is that he's in a position (albeit wrongly) to make your son's life hell.
So maybe wait until the end of the season and then let him have it?? Or...do it now. LOL

Jules said...

I think we all become "that mom" at one time or another. For good reason of course.

McVal said...

I need to be more "that mom" myself. I'm sorry about your son's situation!

sitting on the mood swing at the playground said...

That really stinks. Baseball should be fun. I'm sure other parents feel the same. Sounds like a good time to channel Mama Holland.

KaLynn said...

Report him to the league. He is out there to teach the kids good sportsmanship. He is not. You also have to teach The Athlete that not everyone is like that man. Life is not fair and unfortunately, little league is usually the first place kids come in contact with it.

You can also request a new team. But first off. I would talk to the League president. It may not do any good, but try anyway.

Good luck. Been there done that!

That Mom

Tara said...

I've never been in this particular situation before but sometimes we HAVE to stand up for what is right. What is right? I don't know either but I do know that what he is doing is wrong. I hate that your son is the one suffering in this situation.

Masala Chica said...

I think that you have every right to be "that mom" and i bet you still wouldn't be nowhere as annoying as that mrs. holland. I think she just had it out for you, to be honest with you. cuz you know you are way cooler.

protect the cubs mama. that's just what we have to do. just don't be crazy about it like that mom who killed that cheerleader because she wanted her daughter to be captain. do you rmemeber that? now that lady was a freaking wackjob.

your son is adorable. i would want to kick someone's ass if they were mean to him. seriously.
kiran

Emmy said...

I am so sorry, that really sucks. My last year of softball I was on a team where the mom let her daughter pitch, because the daughter wanted to, and well there was a reason we were last place that year. It was one of my best years though, I made All Star team, but it really was not fun losing. Though I think your situation is worse. sorry :(

tori said...

I can totally relate. I don't consider myself a confrontational person but if you mess with my kids, look out!
Look at the whole situation as "lessons". No matter which direction you choose to take in how you handle this, you will be teaching your son something through it. Maybe by looking at what you think he will take away from how you handle it will help in your decision process.
Does that make any sense?
Hang in there
xoxo

Robyn said...

I'd definitely be "that Mom" in this situation. But, I'd discuss it privately with the league president and ask them to handle it confidentially and without your name in it. Otherwise, not only is your son's love of playing baseball potentially lost, his confidence in himself could be permanently scared. And that isn't anything to let this unskilled "coach" get by with. Worse case, he'll know you went to the league president.

He & Me + 3 said...

Is there any way to bring it up to him subtly? YOu know like...I have noticed that my son is not playing as much anymore...is there something we need to work on? Throw it out there that you notice and see what he says or does. Do any of the other parents say or notice anything?

shortmama said...

Be THAT mom!!!!

Muckala Family said...

Wow! As I read your post I totally pictured me hitting the coaches head in a grand slam play! haha! Excellent writer! You know what, I'm kinda "that mom". hehe

ps-thanks for stopping by, I enjoyed your comment! :)

The Mommyologist said...

Isn't it SO hard not to go into Mama Bear mode!!! Sometimes it is just so tough to keep your cool and be the bigger person and step back!

Erin said...

This bites. And I haven't really had to be "That mom" yet, either. But I'm guessing there are a few other "that moms" with kids on the team? And maybe they're all just feeling like you--nervous to say something, but daydreaming to rip his head off....

I think you should report him. Favoritism isn't fair.

obladi oblada said...

OMG...I would so let that coach have it. I would report him to the league,maybe get the support of other moms who are fed up too.

My son had a football coach last year that was exactly like this, and he will NOT be playing for him again. Not worth the hit to his self esteem AT ALL.

New BB coach this year...hopefully he wont play favorites, because that truly SUCKS.

Dabalack Family said...

I know your little man and he is the biggest team player. I say speak to someone. Every league has its stupid politics, but I would hate for this year to really impact our old soul and have him not want to participate in years to come because of one coach this early in the athletes days!! I love you!!

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