Wednesday, February 10, 2010

There's this Thing I don't Love about Motherhood

Thing is singular.

Meaning that there's just this one nagging THING about motherhood lately that I am not loving.  I have chosen to forego any conversation about stretch marks or breasts that have a new zip code south of their formerly lovely neighborhood.  If not for children, I would have just found some other way to destroy my body so I will not blame any of that on my sweet children.

The Thing is how UnFun I am.  Un.Fun.  Being a Mom has somehow transformed me from the girl who thinks it's fun to play in the rain to the very serious woman who drills math facts in the car and barks about bedtime and brushing twice a day.  Truly UnFun.

I am at an absolute loss on how to bridge the gap between raising responsible, considerate humans and embracing my inner life of the party.  Is there some formula that effectively combines playing Uno and turning in homework on time?  Is it possible to laugh at their antics and ignore bad behavior in church without somehow leading them to believe it's acceptable to make faces during the homily?  My current answer to all of these questions is a resounding No. 
I literally dropped everything tonight and drove too fast to get home so I could love on my kids before I put them to bed.  I really needed to work for a couple more hours, but I had a cozy vision in my mind of snuggling with them both and reading their favorite books.  It would be intimate and warm and they'd each fall asleep dreaming of my love for them and I would have a glass of wine satisfied that I can conquer corporate America tomorrow.  That's not quite how it went down.

Instead I instantly turned into a whirling mess of

"where is this?"

"did you take your medicine?"

"is this due tomorrow?"

"no, we don't have time for that.  it's past your bedtime."

Who is that?  I don't know her.  She is dull and stern and absolutely no fun.  Am I the only one that thinks motherhood is the least amount of fun possible?  Is it our only job to force feed vitamins and make sure no one under the age of 16 leaves the house without a jacket?

The Thing I need is a fun infusion.

And that glass of wine.

20 comments:

Daisy said...

Haha...so funny & True. Life changes so dramatically after children. I'm still getting use to it and my twins are 4.5..LOL
Thanks for stopping by my little spot. Have a great week!

tori said...

I wish I had some words of wisdom. I can remember those days of my kids being young and busy and working and trying to get everything done. Yuck! Maybe schedule some fun? Idk....

Emmy said...

This exact feeling is why I started the Time for Tots day.. just need at least one day a week were I really try and play, be creative, do something different. But even sometimes on those days, I find myself more worried about getting good pictures of the fun for my blog then just enjoying the moment.
it is so hard.. so hard to find that balance and just let go.

MiMi said...

Your UnFun syndrome sounds a lot like this woman I know called Screachy Mommy...Weird.

shortmama said...

Its hard to be fun all the time as a mom! I have been developing little tricks lately to help cut down on how much I feel like Im saying do this and do that...it helps keep me sane!

Dabalack Family said...

So true!! I am right there with you, I wish their was a way to incorporate both in one day, but it always seems to be one or the other. The lets play and have fun all day and then the barking orders day. If I find a way to work both in, you'll be the first to know. Love ya!!

3 Blessings said...

I know exactly what you mean. I am very often the un-fun mom :) I just hope that someday they will be fabulous people who have some memories of fun times in our house :)
Blessings,
Amy

Theta Mom said...

I love this post, it is SO TRUE! That dialogue is the same in my house. I need some fun infusion with that same glass of wine, too!!!

Crystal Escobar said...

Oh my gosh, seriously! You just wrote my exact thoughts! Okay, I'm following you :) Love your blog, and LOVED that you wrote about this. So true, right? It's hard to be fun when you have to be the one that makes sure everything gets done. My husband always gets to be the fun one, and sometimes I feel bad. I just need to TRY harder to make time to be fun. Hard to do, but somehow it has to be possible right? This year I made a goal to do a mommy daughter date with my daughter once a month. I think the one on one PLANNED time together will really help me to connect with her on a more LOVING level, and not demanding :)

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

OMG. I could have written this post. I feel like my son thinks I am the most boring/mean mom in the world.

And it hasn't always been that way. Just the past few years. Hopefully it's a phase for us and we outgrow it once our kids have been in school a few years and mature a little more?

I hope.

Tara said...

We're still at the point of fun though I admit I am not that mother that schedules field trips 3 of 5 days during the week with an action packed weekend. I'm a homebody and I have beat myself up over that. The thing about motherhood that I do not love is hosting birthday parties....ughhh too stressful. That is my un-fun side I guess.

He & Me + 3 said...

I agree...I could have written this post girl I feel your pain. Hang in there. My OCD often won't let me be the fun mom. Ugh.

Desert Rose said...

You and I could sit down and have a drink, you some wine and me some malibu and coke, and have a whole conversation about this. I.feel.the.same.way. Oh the responsibilities put that fun on the back-burner, and I'm not liking it one bit.

Summer said...

I'm so with you on this girl. So with you.

I feel that I have lost a part of the wild n crazy fun me....

How can we get it back???

You figure that out and let me know! =)

marfmom said...

Awww! I wish I had words of wisdom, but instead all I can do is ask that you let me know whenever you learn the secret!

Danielle said...

I am right there with you... I have gone from the rule breaker to the rule maker and I look at my self some days and HATE the "new" me. It is hard to be carefree with two kids so close in age...

Stoppin' by from SITS!

Crafty Girls Workshop said...

You know, I don't have any kids but I know exactly what you mean. I think they make a pill for that, or maybe it's for depression but it makes it easier to laugh at something that would normally drive you nuts. Just my humble opinion. Cute blog! Saw you on SITS.

Anna

Kristen said...

Hi! Thanks for stopping by my blog to say hi. The UnFun mom is sooo me sometimes. I get so focused on the "needs to be done" rather than just letting loose and letting the kids be kids. But not at church :) It's difficult to find a balance at times.

AEG74 said...

You clearly haven't hung out with you lately!!! Cuz I think you're one of the funnest (yes, I said "funnest") gals I know. There's nobody I'd rather have a glass of wine and hang with...you may consider yourself UNfun but I consider you a ball! Loves...

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